Today as I was browsing through friends facebook photos and keeping up with what is happening in their lives I realized something infertility took from me.....it took TIME. So much focus into family building....so much pain to work through.....it all took time away from enjoying life, education, goals that I could have made and met....it changed the way my life would be in the future.
We are still family building....still doing what we can and feel directed to do to add another child to our family. A great deal of energy goes into fostering and our roles in FSA. I don't regret any of what we have been through....or what I have learned and I am incredibly grateful for the growth that has occurred the past 11 years. I just wish I could have known what I know now so I could have planned better. But I realize there is no way I could have known. I was blessed to get through it like I did...intact and stronger. But today I realized infertility has left its mark in very unsuspecting places.
We are still family building....still doing what we can and feel directed to do to add another child to our family. A great deal of energy goes into fostering and our roles in FSA. I don't regret any of what we have been through....or what I have learned and I am incredibly grateful for the growth that has occurred the past 11 years. I just wish I could have known what I know now so I could have planned better. But I realize there is no way I could have known. I was blessed to get through it like I did...intact and stronger. But today I realized infertility has left its mark in very unsuspecting places.
3 comments:
I just love the way you describe infertility! I wish I could do it that well! I am trying to figure out how I found your blog (are on a member of 2ofus4now?) Anyway I am glad I found it! I am a new adoptive mommy and I LOVE your I AM button on your sidebar! I feel like that too, I wouldn't be who I am had I not been through everything! Anyway, I gave your blog an award on my craft blog! I can't wait to keep reading your posts!
I agree with you! It took us 3.5 years to get pregnant with the twins. I knew when I married my spouse I was chosing this trial as he had been married before (and dumped) because of it. We were pretty aggressive about treatment right from the get-go.
That battle took so much of the joy out of our newlywed years. If I'd known that we'd succeed after several IVF failures etc. but that we WOULD succeed, I might have relaxed and enjoyed those years more. Infertility stole a lot of the newlywed bliss from our lives.
Infertility also GAVE me something in addition to those things you mention. It gave me a deeper appreciation and joy for all the little moments of life with these kids. I am gaining more enjoyment from parenting these kids than I ever would have without the struggle. Just as the pain was intensified, so has been the joy.
Good luck to you with your continued family building!
I can't wait to keep reading your posts!
Work from home India
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